Give female sports fans a modicum of credit

9:00am Friday 11th April 2008

Harlequins Rugby League are up against it in trying to attract decent-sized crowds, what with being a northerners' sport in The South and all, so I'm not anti them trying most things to get more Londoners hooked.

What I do take umbrage with, however, is the kind of gratuitous, stereotyped garbage typified by their Girly Guide in last weekend's match-day programme.

"Katie X gives you straight answers to the questions you've always wanted to ask," it chirps.

Such as, have you got time to get a drink and do your make-up in the loo at half-time?

"No you haven't," Katie tut-tuts. "One or the other. Half-time is only 10 minutes and the bar could be busy (40 minutes to go so, if you need a touch-up, you'd better do it)."

Well, clearly, any woman at a live sporting event is there to pick up. And, having followed those hunky male types to the nearest pub to gaze adoringly at them while they deconstruct 80 minutes' worth of sets-of-six, coat-hanger tackles and 40/20 kicks, you want to be looking good when they finally realise you exist.

What other handy tips are in the guide? "If I wanted to go out with one of the players, which position should I go for?"

I realise there are members of the fairer sex who see being a WAG as a career choice but, thankfully, they are in the minority.

And there are actually women out there who can appreciate players for their ability, not just because they are sexy and athletic, like "1, 2, 3 & 4" - apparently, our lipstick-sized brains can't even contend with names of positions - or perhaps they're scores out of 10?

Here's my Girly Guide to Women for the bods at Quins RL. Quite a few of us like sport; love it, in fact. We can follow what's going on, understand the rules and acknowledge the magic moments as much as any bloke.

I remember once chatting to some Dutch lads at a bar after watching their team beat Saudi Arabia in the 1994 World Cup, and happened to mention Marco Van Basten's goal in the '88 European Championships final (if you haven't seen it, YouTube it immediately - arguably one of the best international goals ever scored).

These guys were dumbfounded that a women knew about football and could hold her own in sporting banter.

Well, I've got news for you boys. Not every female watches sport just to perve on the men.

And, besides, everyone knows tennis players have the best legs!

Editor's Choice